Where do you think he is?
Because, goodness knows, I have no idea.
And, let’s be honest: I’m too busy and have enough on my mind and I can’t go around searching for him.
I’m talking about my guy. I haven’t met him. And it’s hard. It’s very hard. It’s hard to have come this long without him. Not because I need him really. Because I don’t. When it’s the right time, we’ll meet and it will be wonderful.
It’s hard because I’m insecure. I doubt many of you out there have come through twenty some years of life without a significant other. And when you come this long without one, it’s hard to think that it has nothing to do with you. Because, I mean, obviously it does. Probably.
Oh, and just to be clear, I’m not saying this to gain pity or anything.
It’s hard because I want him. I want to have someone to call. I want to have someone who makes me laugh. Who teases me. Who knows how to coax a smile out of me and knows when he shouldn’t. Knows when he should just hold me while I cry and tell me it’s going to be okay. Even if it’s something stupid. Even if he comes home and I’m bawling and he freaks out trying to figure out why, only to realize the character I grew attached to in the book I was reading died. Even then, I want him to come in and hold me, even if he gives a soft laugh under his breath. And I want to hold him when he cries. I want to support him endlessly. I want to protect his heart. I want someone to kiss me. I want someone to have tears build in his eyes when he sees me walking down the isle. Who dances with me. Who stops me from being stupid. Who helps me think logically. Who cuddles with me on the couch and lets me fall asleep on his chest. I want someone to share my life with.
That can’t be wrong, can it? To want that? To want love?
Haha. Don’t answer that.
So there’s that. I don’t express that very often.
I guess when you express something, you might as well post it on line.
Goodness. lol what has the world come to?