Shallow.

I walked in feeling an odd since if dread. Not like something bad was going to happen. Just a feeling of ‘maybe I shouldn’t have come.’

I shouldn’t feel that way here.

Familiar faces surround me as I go in. Faces I’ve always known. Faces that don’t know me. Who I am beyond just the look of me. They’ve seen me grow up. Their memories of me go further back than mine do. And they think they know me. But they don’t. They ask the same questions.

“Are there any fellas in your life?”
“Are you still driving that old car?”
“How’s school going?”
“You still want to do your major?”
“How’s your job going? What are you doing again?”

Just stop.

Stop asking the questions. Stop acting like you’re interested. As if you’ve ever made an effort outside of these times. I know that you care. I know that you love me. I love you too. But I don’t know you either. I don’t know what makes you laugh. What keeps you up at night. What you’re passionate about. Where your heart lies. What you invest yourself in.

We don’t know each other.

Same questions. Same answers.

I know you care. I know you love me. I love you too.

This just all seems so shallow.

-Melissa

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