This whole not feeling anything is working pretty well. I mean, I have no idea when the feeling switch is going to be turned back on again and I’m going to be attacked by everything I’m ignoring… but that’s a worry for another day I think.

I would argue that everyone needs a way to self-medicate. I’m not saying it’s healthy, okay? I’m saying that we do it. My way of self-medicating, as I believe I’ve shared on here, is watching copious amounts of tv. And I’m telling you, it’s kind of nice when you can’t feel your own emotions to feel other peoples. Even if those people are fictional.

So, in the past couple days of watching the show I’m into right now, I’ve been reminded about how much I value friendship. For example, for the past few seasons, this guy and girl have been best friends. And I loved it! Because-ugh- friendship is just so pure. Yeah. I think that’s it. Sure, it’s got its ups and downs but guy/girl friendship, when done well, is really really good. It’s balanced. When it’s not clouded with romance or sexual tension or petty crushes, honestly, it’s just so beautiful. It’s special and rare. It makes sense.

Ah. But you see, therein lies the problem. Because it doesn’t make sense to a lot of people. A lot of people assume there’s romance or act like there is or basically tell you you’re lying when you say that’s just not how you see the other person. And a lot of people don’t want to watch guy/girl friendships on the tv. A lot of people want them to fall in love.

And so they do.

So as this ridiculously wonderful friendship I was watching turned into romance, tears actually came to my eyes. It’s not that I hate romance- goodness knows that’s not true. I just wish-I so, so wish- people valued cross-sex friendship. Don’t you realize how rich friendships with people of the opposite sex can be? Don’t you realize not every person of the opposite sex is someone you’re going to romantically be involved with?

People just must not realize what they’re missing.

But maybe it’s just me. Maybe I miss friendship.

I guess “maybe” doesn’t need to be in there.



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